Here’s to all mothers – especially working mothers- whose lives are full of wonderful chaos and inexplicable guilt.

At 5:45 on a Monday evening, as she watched her five-year old son swim under his instructor’s critical gaze, it came to Kaavya that everything about her was mediocre – she was a mediocre home maker, living a mediocre life, in a mediocre suburb in America.

The Writer starts at the voice. He did not sense the woman’s approach. Yet, there she is. Standing so close! Her long black hair cascades down to her hips. Her skin is dusky and aglow with the rich sheen of youthful health. She is of slight build; her lean form wrapped in a rich red saree. She is bare of jewelry except for the diamonds in her ears and – of course- anklets at her feet.

I wriggle down to her stomach. It’s a band of warm chocolate brown above her saree. I press into it. I know I am pushing too hard. I know I am hurting her. But I press on.

And now Amma is crying. Baba shakes her awake. He is angry and tired.

More than 4,000 rapes have been reported in the eastern Congo region this year. It remains one of the world’s worst rape zones.

Deborah Tannen sheds some perspective on this matter. She writes “For males, conversation is the way you negotiate your status in the group and keep people from pushing you around; you use talk to preserve your independence. Females, on the other hand, use conversation to negotiate closeness and intimacy; talk is the essence of intimacy, so being best friends means sitting and talking.”

I do not know whether to laugh or hit the wall in frustration when I read the specific circumstances where women think it’s ok to be beaten up. The most commonly cited offense is ‘being disrespectful to in-laws,’ followed by ‘neglect of house or children.’ The least stated reason is refusal to have sex. I guess the last is a silver lining of sorts?

It’s time to let my world turn again. Sometimes it’s ok to give in.