A common question I encounter in each of these situations when I advocate walking away is “What is the alternative?” What indeed is the alternative? Walking away from years of investment into a relationship meant to be for life? Or is it walking away from the security of a roof over the head? Walking away from everything you have known and are familiar with? Where do you go from there?

Certain pockets of the society feel it unjust to have a law exclusively for women and hence demand a law for men too. The need for an exclusive law arises due to the sheer number of women who are treated badly in their own homes. How many times have we heard about husbands having cigarette burn marks or being beaten up by their fathers in law or being ill treated for dowry!

Domestic Violence is not a phenomenon of the rural or urban poor alone in India. According to a UN estimate, 70% of India’s women have been beaten, raped or coerced into having sex. The understanding of domestic violence is itself, quite poor in India – slapping a wife, daughter or sister (in some cases even a fiancé or a girlfriend) finds widespread social legitimacy. Two-thirds of the women in India, according to a UNDP estimate believed it was all right for men to slap them for “infringements” as small as failing to prepare a meal well.I wish I had a big bell to ring out of my balcony, every time I see a man come home drunk and beat his wife. If a bell were rung for every woman abused at home– physically, sexually and emotionally – we would be living in a world of tinnitus. But perhaps that’s the only cure.