Talking about vaginas is not sexy – not in the least bit. I’m not saying it couldn’t be made sexy, but we choose to keep that out and instead simply talk about them – making ourselves vulnerable, being honest, for once emerging from the forts we’ve constructed for ourselves. That fort is sexy – it doesn’t care about anything but its own defence, plays power games and cannot, will not love – loving you see, is vulnerability. That’s how it differs from admiration – to admire and to be admired involves no risk.